We want to do better for our kids. Give them opportunities. Have them learn to survive in this fast paced driven society. But, we hurt them. I do it. And, it's hard for me to swallow it because I see how my husband and I work hard. My child feels entitled to the lifestyle we have that our community seems to flaunt on social media. That is not reality folks! What we post is just a glimpse of our lives and a perspective we want to share.
Behind the camera is a story. And, it's not always pretty. When I look back as I help my daughter prepare a birthday gift for her BFF. The years have flown by. They have history. I see how friends have come and gone in their group. They remain friends and really more like sisters. Able to put each other in check and call each other names like no other person can to one another. They have shared their most intimate secrets of crushes, family issues and goals. I love to see this! What is difficult is seeing as they go through these teenage years, the foundation they have built shaken. And, as a parent, I need to allow my child to navigate through these emotions of change: hormones, new friendships, crushes, jealousy, gossip and self esteem issues while guiding them. There is such a fine line of how much we should be involved. I remember growing up and my Mom was busy to see the everyday operations of the house, so I stepped in as an only girl in the family. My 8th grade year was so hard! I cried when I was bullied. I cry now when I see my child being bullied. What do I do when my child is defending herself and trying to communicate but it falls on deaf ears? My first reaction to fix it. To step in. My child has asked me to let her handle it. What do I do next when I see her handling it and it backfires? Keep my mouth shut? Not address it? I'm torn!
I sit in church with my child. Sitting in silence while I see her wipe her tears. And, it breaks my heart into pieces. So I hold her. I hug her and I reminded my most important job. To be there for her. When she tells me she wants to sleep next to me.
For months, I've brewed with the idea of homeschooling this child of mine who wants to be "included" and find her place among her peers. She has learned from her 1st year in junior high the importance of voice, respect, and kindness. I don't want to paint a picture that my child hasn't done her share. And, I am well aware of it. Especially when she reminds me that I am a "stalker" on social media. I'm just using it as a tool to learn more about my daughter and her peers. Isn't it my job? Aren't I allowed to? I pay for her cell phone. So yes! I don't have to justify it to my child. Just give me your phone when I ask for it.
Am I raising an unprepared child? The world out here is volatile! There are shootings, acts of violence against women and children, religion and greed for money. I use these past few days to discuss the current events and values. Why are we in this current state? There is a struggle between good vs.evil. As humans we go through this struggle on a daily basis. On 9/11 I was reminded how big my responsibility would be to raise this child. And today, 14 years later with the world discussing transgender issues and same sex marriage, I cannot fathom the struggles these children are encountering because there was not this issue when I was growing up.
I step back to gain perspective from the last week and it's been a roller coaster of emotions. I cannot complain. It was been eye opening. What a learning experience it has been and I appreciate the honesty my child has when we get to sit one on one. I am going to count my blessings even when I feel the eye of storm is circling around us. May the good Lord continue to guide my family and I.
I sit in church with my child. Sitting in silence while I see her wipe her tears. And, it breaks my heart into pieces. So I hold her. I hug her and I reminded my most important job. To be there for her. When she tells me she wants to sleep next to me.
Am I raising an unprepared child? The world out here is volatile! There are shootings, acts of violence against women and children, religion and greed for money. I use these past few days to discuss the current events and values. Why are we in this current state? There is a struggle between good vs.evil. As humans we go through this struggle on a daily basis. On 9/11 I was reminded how big my responsibility would be to raise this child. And today, 14 years later with the world discussing transgender issues and same sex marriage, I cannot fathom the struggles these children are encountering because there was not this issue when I was growing up.
I step back to gain perspective from the last week and it's been a roller coaster of emotions. I cannot complain. It was been eye opening. What a learning experience it has been and I appreciate the honesty my child has when we get to sit one on one. I am going to count my blessings even when I feel the eye of storm is circling around us. May the good Lord continue to guide my family and I.
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