Back to school shopping

Every year in the summer, the girls are excited for back to school shopping. New outfits, school supplies and new teachers.

Change is good! It brings exciting uncertainty of new beginnings. My girls will be starting 6th grade and 8th grade. Which means this is a transitional year. And, I see it. The pre-teen a little more conscious of the body changes and interested in boys. The teen more confident in her friendships and finding her passion in soccer. 

My 11 year old already picking out her own outfits. She wears it with confidence. An ivory crochet shirt with flower joggers from Forever 21, kids collection. Reasonable priced, comfortable to wear and stylish. And, paired with tan sandals from Nordstrom on sale by Steve Madden.

What I will remember this summer is watching the girls mature. They gained a new sister. I've seen them become little mommies, become protective of each and sacrifice their time to take care of me and their sister.

Taking a break from shopping and cooling off with a mango black tea lemonade from Starbucks. My oldest soothing my youngest....truly sister love. 

Oh Baby!

It's been months since I last blogged. I had unfinished drafts because so much has happened. Oh boy!  Life has taken a turn. I am now a mother of 3 girls. Never in my wildest dreams after all my health issues over the last 8 years would I have another child. Let alone healthy.

And, so I introduce Baby Cakes...just kidding BABY CAIRA NATALIE LOMELI. And, she has been such a blessing to our family and friends. She has been welcomed and showered with so much love. Literally! It is so mind blowing how much a baby can transform so many lives. How in the midst of mourning the loss of my Grandma, this tiny life breathes new life into our own.

I was afraid to tell my older girls and my family when I was pregnant because I wasn't sure if they would be happy. And, my girls' first reaction was less than pleasant. They were MAD as heck! I was told that I ruined their lives. That I couldn't possibly handle 3 kids (my mom). And,  as talked it out with them later after their initial shock. Their anger was really fear. It was based on my health issues and would this pregnancy cause further health issues or possibly have health issues because of my thyroid cancer? So I prayed with them. Prayed that my
 baby would be healthy. Prayed that my body could provide a healthy enough environment to carry to full term.

And, here she is...healthy! Carried to full term. Did I have complications? Yes! But, it reminded me that I had to slow down and take care of my baby and myself.

She is now 7 weeks old and we have had some hiccups along the way. No one tells you when you are  over 40 having a baby takes you so much longer to recover. The post partum depression is no joke. And, your energy level and is lower your pains are heightened. Managing three kids is chaotic. Making sure everyone's needs are met. Whether they are 13 yrs, 11 yrs or 1 1/2 months. It has been difficult to balance it all. But, we have gotten through it. And, we are still smiling. Might have some bags to show for the lack of sleep.

I'm learning. To take one day at a time. Count myself blessed. As difficult as it is to be lacking sleep. She is growing leaps and bounds. I found these new sets of moms on social media who share the everyday twinnings of motherhood. Mama say it does not last forever. So cherish the present. And, so far I AM!!

Changing tides

Life has a way of changing tides. I am learning to ride the waves. I am now a mother of 3. It's been over 10 years since I've had a newborn. The memories I had of taking care of a newborn was clouded with bits of pieces missing. The blur of being home the first week is broken into large chunks that consist of lack of sleep,  ways to fit in necessities such as food and showers. My saving grace are my support system. My mother, mother in law, my two older girls and girlfriends. My husband on the other hand has taken a back seat until I had a hormonal breakdown. It is easy for me to expect him to know what to do when to do it but I am not good at communicating my needs. And, as a man, I can't expect him to know what I want. So this first weekend, I told him and not in the nicest of ways. He tries poor thing but I cannot expect anything let alone have him do things the way I do them. This is learning lesson for to communicate consistently, forgive and forget, gratefulness and humility.

I got schooled by my Mom and Mother in law to tell people when I need help. That it is OK. And, watching them teach my older daughter old school skills and our culture is priceless. I remember a time when I could do it all. My way was the best way and getting help was for the weak. Little did I know then. Most of the stress I caused myself. Seeing my two girls mature and become responsible young women tells me they are more capable then the credit I give them. These changing tides require me to let them ride the waves and learn from their own experiences.

Springs into life

It's been awhile since I blogged. And, so much has taken my time with mothering, working with Autistic kids and teaching. I am now 7 months pregnant with my 3rd child. Having a kid in your 40s is no joke. There are pains I didn't have when I was pregnant in my 20s and 30s. But, this experience is wholly different. I am learning to slow things down and appreciate down time. The relationships I nurture are the quality ones. I'm not so much in a hurry to keep myself busy although having two kids playing travel soccer is busy just by itself.

I have taken to enjoying quality time at home. Nesting has taken place. Reading to calm me down. Listening to my body to rest and allow myself to take naps without feeling guilty. Just a year ago life as I viewed it was different. I had to fill my time with business and busyness.

Parody of life

All the money on this earth couldn't fix all the problems. And, the sheer fact that people have an inherent desire to supplement their lives with material goods to bring fulfillment. This is sad. I see this around me. The trips, gadgets, cars are just temporary fixes to the loneliness they feel inside.

My girls made comment about how sad it was to see these people and made a bold statement about what creates happiness. How insightful of my 10 year old to share her thoughts.

So it made me think of why I work so hard and to show the girls that creating a career with financial stability is important. We want options in life to do the things we enjoy. We need to provide the basic necessities. Where do we draw the line? When it becomes excessive?

We read this book this month about how a father prepares a legacy for his only child. Creating an option for this adult child. I prepare for this as I look at all that I have accomplished and attained in assets. It's to leave behind a legacy for my kids and their kids. To create opportunities to have quality time with them. To make memories alongside them. I sacrifice the material things I once dreamed of. The custom made home, exotic car, world class travel and substitute it for being a wife and mom. A teacher at a mediocre salary considering I have post baccalaureate education. I'm ok with it. I share everday moments such as first days of school, stories about puppy love, friendships formed, and disappointing moments. I've got a limited amount of years. And, before I know it my oldest will be going off to college. I am gonna soak this in. The days they want to snuggle in bed, ask to walk with them and the big bear hugs in public.

Getting Oily

As flu season approaches, I am using preventative methods such as young essential oils:
-thieves for boosting immune system
-lavender for assisting with sleep
-panaway for helping with my asthma

I've had to many health issues and don't want to compromise my health more. My kids are more at risk because of my health history.
I'm teaching them about healthy choices. Sprouts and Trader Joes have been our frequent store to stop by. Fresh fruits and vegetables are staples. Increasing our water intake.

I've just need to watch my caffeine intake and late night munchies. Not just because of my dress size because my metabolism is slowing with 4th decade coming straight on.

I've replenished with paraben free, zinc free and alcohol  free toiletries such as Toms toothpaste, Younique makeup, homemade soaps and cleaners. Why? There is a correlation between toxicity of absorbed chemicals through the skin and gums over time with increased cancer rates.

If anything minimizing my risk for a secondary cancer and reducing the risk for my family. There is enough pollution and poor air quality that affects our health.

Changing habits one day at a time!

To will

Creating willingness to do the right thing and help others is such a different way of thinking in this society that is self- centered. Everyone sitting in their bubble of life. Driving past children in school zones not paying attention to the safety of kids. Opportunistic people stealing their neighbors goods that they earned and work hard to get. People shoving people who get their way without manners. I get annoyed. Is this what I have surrounding me and my community. The examples set for my children?

I sat talking to a group of 15-16 year old kids of various ethnicities but with one commonality. Pursuit to be closer to God. At least I thought so, when I asked them why they came no one answered. But, their body language showed they didn't want to be in a class with me. It made me sad at first and then I prayed with them and them with me. So there, I was able to lay seeds in their minds and hearts.

And, my heart resonated when at week 2, they shared more about their daily struggles. I listened to how they deal with pressures of having good grades, living up to expectations of their parents, peer pressure and relationships. It gave me insight on what I have to look forward to. I just need to remember to have open ears for when I need to listen to my kids struggles and cries for help.